Funny New Year Wishes And Messages

A bright New Year is approaching fast, leaving behind all the sad and unfortunate moments of the previous year. Give your best to make all your beloved people around you happy, beginning with a cute and funny New Year wish. Because there’s no better way to kick off the New Year other than having a good fun time with family and friends with a huge smile and a couple of laughs.

Whether you’re known as the comedian in the friend group or not, try these funny Happy New Year wishes to share. The wishes are perfect for that quirky friend or family member who can appreciate a good joke. Once you’ve got the whole group laughing, toast to another year of fond memories and fun!

Funny New Year Wishes

1. This year may I wish you finally learn how to use your smartphone properly.
2. To a New Year full of new possibilities, even though I’m sure we’ll just do the same old stuff anyways.
3. Happy New Year and good luck in the next year! We’ll both need it!
4. Wishing you 12 months of success, 52 weeks of laughter, 365 days of fun, 8760 hours of joy, 525600 minutes of good luck and 31536000 seconds of happiness.
5. Happy New Year. Here’s to having a fresh start at binge eating, boozing, and slacking off.
6. I’ve been waiting 365 days to say “Happy New Year” since I had so much fun saying it last year. Happy New Year, Friend.
7. May this New Year bring actual change in you, nor recurrence of old habits in a new package.
8. A New Year is the chance to start over with a clean slate. Too bad my credit card won’t start over with a blank slate.
9. The most fun part about making New Year’s resolutions is breaking New Year’s resolutions. Can’t wait to mess up with you.
10. I’m so excited for the new year. Unfortunately, I don’t have any resolutions to make since I’m already perfect.
11. Happy New Year. Here is a wish for the New Year from someone who is adorable, handsome and intelligent and want to see you smiling always.
12. We all get the exact same 365 days. The only difference is what we do with them.
13. Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.
14. Happy New Year. Here’s to another year pretending that I like you people.

Funny New Year Messages

1. One more year has gone and you’re still the dumb person you were always. Let’s hope you can be a better person this year!
2. Remember mate that life always gives you a second chance. What are new years for? Grab your chances every time! Happy New Year.
3. You know what’s my favorite part of the new year? I always make my resolutions when I’m drunk so that I never am committed to them. Happy New Year.
4. Keep making the same old mistakes, but do it in a new way. Accept my heartfelt, warm wishes for this new year. All the best!
5. New years are like restart buttons to start things over again, except the fact that your device is long dead. Have an enjoyable new year!
6. You know you’re old and tired when you just want to have a nap instead of being drunk and have fun on a New Year’s Eve. Happy new year 2021!
7. The funniest thing about the last day of a year is that you can make a bunch of unrealistic to-dos list & still everyone would say you can accomplish them!
8. I’m not making any new resolutions for the New Year. I’m really good at annoying you and I’ll simply continue on that path!
9. May all your problems vanish as quickly as your new year’s resolution does every year. I wish you a happy new year full of happiness!
10. Life is already full of good things. You just have to stop complaining and be a little bit more optimistic. Enjoy this new year with a glass-half-full of vodka!
11. New years bring you a lot of new problems. But the good thing is, they usually last just as long as your new year’s resolution. Happy new year!
12. It’s time of the year to make new year’s resolutions that you know you can never keep. But you’ll do it anyway. Happy new year!
13. Life has taught me that no matter what you say and how hard you try; you can never stop some people from making stupid new year resolutions! Happy new year!
14. I’m planning to come to your house on the 31st of December so that on the 1st of Jan, I can say – I have been living in your house for a year! Happy New Year.

65 Hilarious New Year Messages

1. It’s 20** already? I need a few more weeks.
2. They say the New Year is a blank book, but I have writer’s block.
3. Kiss me at midnight. Or whenever you want to, actually.
4. Have a tremendous New Year while giving everyone a hard time apart from me. Cheers to that.
5. I hope you will finally pay off all the debts you owe to me for making my life miserable. Looking forward to that, best wishes.
6. You have so many things to gain this year including success, fame, and wisdom. Don’t just focus on gaining weight instead. Happy new year dear friend!
7. I have a big pile of regrets from last year to sweep out the door, so I can start on a new pile.
8. It’s a new year, but with the same old problems. Oh, well, at least we’re alive. For now.
9. May God bless you with enough motivation to eat less and workout more often. Say no to obesity this new year! Wishing you all the best!
10. In 20**, if you see light at the end of the tunnel, be sure it’s not a train headed straight for you.
11. 365 new trips around the sun, 365 new opportunities and …. 365 new disappointments. Happy New Year full of joy and laughter!
12. May the New Year be like a fireworks factory: full of potential if you don’t play with fire.
13. It’s a new year; I get a new chance, Could I get a cash advance?
14. Happy you near. oops! Happy New Year!
15. Welcome, New Year! Just be sure you wipe your feet at the door, and don’t walk all over me like last year did.
16. Happy New Year! Spoiler alert–it’s going to feel the same.
17. Let’s sparkle in the New Year. Or maybe sweat just a little.
18. Here’s to a mediocre New Year! Hey, being honest is one of my resolutions. May 20** bring us fun and laughter!
19. This year, I resolve to make no mistakes. LOL!
20. 20** is toast, and 20** is the best thing since sliced bread.
21. You have this year in the palm of your hand. Don’t squeeze the life out of it.
22. Cheers to the New Year, but booze to forget the old one.
23. If the New Year gives you a swift kick in the pants, just use the momentum to keep moving forward.
24. The coming New Year is no joke. It just feels funny.
25. Wishing you a new year filled with all your favorite things: sequins, sarcasm, and shenanigans.
26. Does it worry you just a little that we need alcohol to face another year?
27. Have some faith in me, this year just like the previous ones- I will be your partner in crime.
28. This year, you may pick up your phone more often, praying to God for this miracle. I wish you a Happy New Year, mate.
29. Welcome the New Year with your ugly smile and scare all the evils away. Have a great year ahead.
30. Hope you will not be bothered with New Year’s resolutions this year as well. May God bless you, friend.
31. My New Year’s resolution is to dream more. I guess that means I’ll need to sleep a lot.
32. In 20**, I want to be a role model, as soon as I figure out what my role is.
33. Well, it’s a new year. Back to the drawing board. Happy New Year with love, kisses & laughter!
34.  20**–time to grab the bull by the horns and show it who’s boss.
35. In 20**, I’ll be your biggest fan. I just hope I don’t blow it! Happy New Year!
36. Cheers to a new year! Time to get our butts in gear.
37. Dream small, and you can achieve it all. It’s the only wish that may come true for the New Year!
38. New Year? They say, “Keep calm and carry on,” but I prefer to panic and stop dead in my tracks.
39. I think the Baby New Year needs a diaper change.
40. Happy New Year! Let’s pop the cork and start breaking the rules!
41. 20** is in the rear view mirror, and 20** is a big, open highway. Roll on, Baby, and watch for squirrels!
42. I hope the New Year is fruitful and appealing. Like bananas. I love bananas.
43. It’s a new year. Let’s get it right so we won’t be left.
44. In the New Year, let’s run around together. Literally. We need to lose weight.
45. My New Year’s resolution is to actually use up all the lotion, Chapstick, hand sanitizer, and other crap that hangs out in the bottom of my purse.
46. This year, I resolve to remember why I came into the room.
47. May your new year smell like a new car and never run out of gas.
48. Instead of saying, “Happy New Year,” couldn’t we just break it into months? You know, like, “Happy February!” I function better with smaller tasks.
49. Here’s hoping you can say whoa to the woe this year.
50. This year, may your dough flow and your skin glow! Happy New Year with love and laughter!
51. If the New Year was an infomercial, I’d throw in another one for the price of shipping! I hope 20** delivers!
52. Have you ever wondered how Father Time becomes a little baby each year? At midnight, let’s watch to find out what he’s drinking.
53. If we’re friends on Facebook, does that mean I can kiss you at midnight?
54. In 20**, let’s live dangerously! I’ll get some scissors, and we can run with them!
55. In the New Year, may we win the lottery. Just the thought makes my eyes watery!
56. It’s a new year; let’s live it up! We’ll pick some other year to act grown up!
57. In 20**, let’s resolve to lose the weight and lose the wait!
58. It’s New Year’s! Let’s celebrate until the champagne runs over our chins and confetti is stuck in our hair.
59. Who needs firecrackers to celebrate New Year’s Eve? I’ll be your personal ball of fire, and I promise you won’t get burned!
60. The New Year is going to be sweet like a big bite of your favorite ice cream! Just don’t let it give you a brain freeze!
61. Sweet dreams to 20**! May 20** wake you up like a pot of strong coffee! Happy New Year with laughter and happiness!
62. I hope you lose so much weight this year that you can take group selfies with more people on the frame. Happy new year!
63. May you learn to use your brain in the coming year. It’s a wonder that you got through all these years without having one. Happy new year!
64. Happy new year to someone who took the phrase ‘barely surviving’ to a whole new level. You’re a survivor without motivation. Happy new year!
65. Here’s hoping the New Year is a fancy yacht cruising you to amazing destinations, and that you weather all the storms without puking your guts out.