Jokes

Funny Zoo Jokes For Laughs And Gags

Best Zoo Questions and Answers Jokes: A walk around the zoo can relieve stress so is funny zoo jokes. Zoos are almost always a long roundabout walking tour, and the best part is that you will not even notice all the numbers you are adding to the pedometer.

Here are some guaranteed hilarious Zoo Jokes, Zoo Puns And One Liners suitable for both adults and kids that will make you laugh. Enjoy!

Funny Zoo Puns

List of some funny zoo puns. These hilarious zoo puns and zoo captions can be used for Instagram, or even real-life pun-banter. 

A cage gate at the rare Asian animals’ annex at the zoo was left unlocked. It was a panda-monium.

I spotted a lion at the zoo the other day. He looks like a leopard now.

All the animals at the zoo were asleep when I visited. I was otterly disappointed.

Go to a goat petting zoo to experience a close encounter of the herd kind.

I applied for the position of a keeper at the zoo but turns out I was not koalafied.

I spent ages trying to get through to the zoo by phone. Apparently all of their lions were busy.

I went to the zoo and a rhino tried to charge me. I told him I had already paid.

I did not expect such a big animal to come out of a small dwelling. Talk about an elephant of surprise!

I need to know what time it is rhino.

I saw a caged baguette in the zoo. The sign read ‘bread in captivity’.

Many hares escaped the zoo, so they sent a search party to comb the area.

One simply cannot play fair and win in a zoo – there are way too many cheetahs.

People flocked around the cute lion cubs in the enclosure. They were the mane attraction at the zoo.

Thank ewe for being so kind to the animals at the petting zoo.

The alligators’ favorite drink is Gatorade.

The lion at the zoo had his body shaved for lice.  “Aww mane, no fur”, he thought to himself.

There are no painkillers to be found at the zoo – the parrotsate’emall.

Wild cats have the best teeth in the zoo because they fl-ocelot.

You cannot trust the predators in the zoo, they are always lion.

Short Funny Stories About Zoo

Life In A Zoo

There was this zebra who had lived her entire life in a zoo and was getting on a bit so the zoo keeper decided as a treat that she could spend her final years in bliss on a farm. The zebra was so excited, she got out of the horse float to see this huge space with green grass and hill and trees and all these strange animals. She saw a big fat weird looking brown thing and ran up to it all excited, “Hi! I’m a zebra, what are you?” “I’m a cow” said the cow. “Right, and what do you do?” asked the zebra. “I make milk for the farmer” said the cow. “Cool.” The zebra then saw this funny looking little white thing and ran over to it. “Hi, I’m a zebra, what are you?” “I’m a chicken,” said the chicken. “Oh, right, what do you do?” asked the zebra. “I make eggs for the farmer.” said the chicken. “Right – o, great, see ya round.” Then the zebra saw this very handsome beast that looked almost exactly like her without the stripes. She ran over to it and said, “Hi, I’m a zebra, what are you?” “I am a Stallion,” said the stallion. “Wow,” said the zebra. “What do you do?” “Take off your pajamas darling, and I’ll show you.”

Baby Camel

It’s a baby camel goes to see his mother and asks her

“Mom, why do we have a lump on the back?” She replies “It is to be able to store the water for more time my darling.” The baby camel then asks “Ah, and why do we have big hooves?” “It’s to be able to pass the hardest paths my darling.” the mother replies “And why do we have big eyelids?” asks the baby. “It’s to prevent the sand from entering our eyes darling.” replies the mother “Oh, Ok” and the baby looks around him and turns to his mother: “But then Mom, what are we doing in San Diego Zoo?”

Escape

A kangaroo keeps escaping from his enclosure at a zoo. The blonde zookeeper decides to add a meter to the wall of the enclosure. But it doesn’t work, the kangaroo escapes again. So the zookeeper adds 3 meters to the wall. Still nothing, the kangaroo escapes again. The zookeeper adds 5 meters to the wall. But the kangaroo escapes again and again. When the kangaroo has just been brought back, his friend the elephant asks him, “When are you going to stop?” The kangaroo answers him: “Surely when they think about closing the door of my enclosure.”

Front Seat

A policeman in the big city stops a man in a car with a monkey in the front seat. “What are you doing with that monkey?” He exclaimed, “You should take it to the zoo.” The following week, the same policeman sees the same man with the monkey again in the front seat, with both of them wearing sunglasses. The policeman pulls him over. “I thought you were going to take that monkey to the zoo!” The man replied, “I did. We had such a good time we are going to the beach this weekend!”

Hilarious Zoo Q&A Jokes For Laugh

Q: What’s the difference between a Southern zoo and a Northern zoo?
A: A Southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe.

Q: How do monkeys get down the stairs?
A: They slide down the banana-ster!

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest?
A: An Investigator

Q: What do you call an angry monkey?
A: Furious George.

Q: What’s the difference between a tiger and a lion?
A: A tiger has the mane part missing.

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A: A Mars-upial

Q: Where do bats keep their money?
A: The blood bank!

Q: Why can’t you own a sick eagle?
A: Because it’s Ill-eagle!

Q: What do elephants and trees have in common?


A: They both have big trunks!

Q: What did Matt Damon say when a wolf took a bite out of his leg?
A: Howl do you like them apples!

Q: What to polar bears eat for lunch?
A: Ice berg-ers!

Q: What do you call a naughty hippopotamus in nature?
A: Hip Hop Hooray…Ho..Hey…Ho.

Q: What do you get when two giraffes collide?
A: A giraffic jam.

Q: What do you get when you mix an elephant with a rhino?
A: Elephino. (HEll if I know)

Q: Whats a penguins favorite relative?
A: Aunt Arctica!

Q: What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A: A quantum leap.

Q: Why don’t they play poker in the zoo?
A: Too many cheetahs.

Q: Did you hear about the zoo where the only exhibit was a dog?
A: It was a shih tzu.

Q: What did the elephant say to a naked man?
A: Hey that’s cute but can you breath through it?

Q: What do you call a place where the animals pratice martial arts?
A: A Jujit-zoo.

Q: What happened when the lion ate the comedian ?
A: He felt funny!

Q: Why can’t a leopard hide?
A: Because he’s always spotted!

Q: Why can’t zoo animals take tests?
A: There are too many cheetahs!

Q: Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
A: They only like sole.

Q: Did you hear about the party at the Chinese zoo?
A: It was Panda-monium.

Q: Why shouldn’t you take a bear to the zoo?
A: Because they’d rather go to the cinema!

Q: Why did the giraffe get bad grades?
A: He had his head in the clouds.

Q: What do you call a crocodile with GPS?
A: A Navi-gator.

Funny Zoo Jokes For Laughs And Gags
Abbreviations And Their Meaning